I got the worst night of sleep EVER last night.  First of all, I went to bed waaaaaaaay too late (for someone who is supposed to be taking care of two babies), and then I just slept like complete shit.  Both Freddie (the big dog) and Jeff (the big husband) were snoring, so that made it hard to actually fall asleep.  Once I fell asleep, it was hard to stay asleep because my face hurt so damn bad (from the horrible acne breakouts I have on my chin and hairline).  I actually had to get up at 3:30 to relieve some of the pressure of a few of the culprits (sorry that’s so gross, but as you know, I’m an oversharer), and from there I just couldn’t fall back to sleep.  I kept dreaming of our babies – what they would look like, what genders they will be, will they have Jeff’s eyes, my lips, etc – and it literally kept me up all night (morning).  Finally, at 4:30 I just said “screw it”, and got up, took a shower, and headed into work.  If I’m going to be up, I may as well be getting paid for it!

In bigger, more important news, I’m fairly certain that I felt one, or both, of the babies moving around last night.  It was SO weird.  It felt like somebody was tickling me from the inside, but it only lasted a few seconds each time.  When I was lying awake thinking about my snoring dog and husband, my pizza face, and my babies, I just wanted them to move again because it was so cool.  I have waited a long ass time for that, and wow, I just can’t wait until I start feeling them more regularly!

Kerry

Vegas -Part Two

October 28, 2008

Where were we?

Oh yeah.  Saturday night we stayed out until 1:30 in the morning.  Yes.  1:30 a.m.  And boy, was I feeling it the next day!  We got to sleep in a little bit, but Kristy called our room so excited to eat at the Bellagio buffet, so we got a move on, and got to the buffet line right when everyone else in Vegas did.  Oh well, it was only about a 45 minute wait, and it was totally worth it!  I think Jeff, Kristy, and Joel drank their money’s worth in mimosas, and I am fairly certain that I (along with BoGo) ate my money’s worth!  It was just as delicious as I had remembered (kind of like In N Out).  After brunch, we thought a walk was in order, so we made our way to several casinos that Kristy and Joel hadn’t seen yet.  We saw Mandalay Bay, Luxor, Excaliber, and MGM Grand.  Then we headed to New York New York again, where Kristy and Joel went on the roller coaster.  I couldn’t go because the sign said so…

After that excitement, we headed back to the hotel, where we changed and got ready to go to Treasure Island for the Cirque de Soleil show, Mystere.  It was a surprise for Kristy, and both she and Jeff had a lot of fun!   Before the show, we had some time to kill, so we stopped for drinks (and a free show) at a place that has these AMAZING flair bartenders.  Jeff and I had seen one of them on the Food Network, and he was so cool to watch in person.  All four of the bartenders did the craziest tricks, and it was really fun to see.  After Mystere, we took a cab to New York New York (again) for some pizza since we never had dinner.  And after that, everyone was ready to call it a night, believe it, or not.  Fine by me!

We got up on Monday and did more sightseeing.  Nothing too exciting, since we were all pretty much Vegased-out – but we did manage to see the Venetian and the Wynn.  We stopped for a break (for the pregnant lady) at the Wynn and had some refreshments and a strawberry shortcake sundae for BoGo, and then Jeff and I left to go back to the hotel to get our luggage and head to the airport.  Kristy and Joel’s flight wasn’t until two hours later, so they went over to the Stratosphere to go on the Big Shot ride.  Jeff played the pregnancy-card at the airport, and got us upgraded to first-on the flight, which was awesome.  First on means first off, baby!  For the first time ever, he actually had enough leg room, LOL! 

I’ll leave you now (time for bed) with a few more pictures from our Vegas vacation!  Good night! 

Kerry

Happy 1st birthday to my favorite little nephew!!!!

I can’t believe it’s been a year since my nephew made his (surprise) grand entrance into this world!  It’s been so fun watching him grow up, but if he could slow it down a little bit, I would really appreciate it (as I’m sure your mom and dad would, too)!  It’s so cliche saying that “they grow up really fast”, so it’s just so true!  I wanted to commemorate today by giving you all a “then and now” look at my adorable little nephew (and I would like to apologize in advance for making my sister-in-law, LeAnn, cry…again).

Then (picture taken about two minutes after he was born)…

Now (picture taken about two hours shy of a year later)…

I still remember the day Asher was born…we had a couples shower for Jeff’s brother, Marty, and LeAnn, the night before – so when Marty called to tell us that they were in the hospital, and it was “for real” this time, we were both really surprised.  LeAnn wasn’t due for another 4 weeks, so it was pretty early.  By the time we got to the hospital, it was almost too late – LeAnn had just gotten the epidural, which explains why she didn’t care if I stayed in the delivery room to watch (you gotta catch ’em while they’re drugged up, LOL).  Watching Ash being born was probably one of the most amazing experiences of my life, and seeing the new family together for the first time only solidified the fact that I really wanted to be a mommy.  I’m so excited to finally have that experience!

Kerry

Wow, being away from the internet for a long weekend is weird.  I totally feel out of sorts, like I have no idea what’s really going on in the world, lame as that may sound.  Of course, part of that is probably because being in Vegas makes you feel like you’re in some alternate universe where “the real world” doesn’t really exist.  LOL!  We got in quite late last night (we had to pick up the dogs before we came home – thanks again to my other mom and dad for watching Rex and Freddie!), so the last thing I wanted to do was jump on the computer “real quick”.  So far this morning, I have been online “real quick” for about 2 hours, just catching up on email, Google Reader (if you haven’t discovered this yet, it’s the BEST way to keep up-to-date with all of your favorite blogs, check it out!), and several online message boards I belong to.  Quite a productive start to my day, I’d say!  I do have to say I am super glad I took today off work, because I am beat!  Vegas is a really hard place to be when you’re pregnant – it’s extremely tiring!  I was trying really hard to be a trooper, but yesterday I seriously thought I was going to die because I was so exhausted – I think BoGo will appreciate the “day off” today, although I have plans pretty much all afternoon…

We have officially (according to every pregnancy book out there) surpassed the first trimester!  Hip hip hooray!  I cannot believe it!  The babies are the size of lemons (about 3 1/2 inches each, from head to butt), and boy can I feel it!  My tummy is starting to balloon out, and it’s all hard and weird – I am actually starting to look pregnant, instead of just a little “fluffy”, which is fun.  I am learning to embrace my little bump, and Jeff is absolutely loving it – he likes to put his hand on his belly and “show off” the babies to everyone, including strangers – it’s just so great to see how genuinely excited and happy he is that this is happening.  Anyway, back to the babies.  =)  They can now make funny faces, and they might even be sucking their thumbs by now (by the way, their little hands and feet should be about a half inch long by now, isn’t that crazy?).  Brain impulses are allowing this to happen, and I can only imagine the facial expressions that our little ones are making (sticking out their tongues, frowning, etc).  We should be able to see a lot of movement at our next ultrasound appointment (November 6th), and I’m so incredibly excited to see them again.  I think when you struggle with trying to get pregnant for so long, you have a hard time attaching yourself to the fact that you’re pregnant when it does happen.  Finally, I am really starting to feel myself wanting to know more and more about the babies, and becoming more and more excited for them to make their appearance next spring.  It’s a great feeling.

And now for our Vegas trip recap – it was fantastic!  We met Kristy and Joel at the airport (their flight got in an hour before ours did), and they were already doing it Vegas-style – they were two margaritas and a breakfast burrito in by the time they met up with us!  We took a taxi to Bally’s, checked our luggage, and did some sightseeing for an hour, or so.  Then, we decided to head to In N Out Burger.  Mmmmmm, In N Out Burger.  For those of you who have never been there, you are missing out – I hadn’t been there in a little over three years, and it was just as delicious as I had remembered.  I had a Double Double with onions, fries, and a chocolate shake.  The babies liked it.  A lot.  Kristy and Joel were pretty impressed, too!

From there, we took a cab back to the strip and did more sightseeing, and a little bit of gambling “in Paris”.  Nobody won anything, but we had fun either way.  We went back to the hotel for a quick nap before dinner, and then we met up with one of my old college roommates, Steve, and his girlfriend, Valerie, at Caesar’s Palace, where we had dinner at Bobby Flay’s Mesa Grill.  Holy YUM.  It was AMAZING.  Probably one of the best dinners I have ever had (next to Buddakan in NYC) – AND – I got two delicious virgin peach daquiris, which made me feel not-so-out-of-place with everyone else drinking alcohol.  It was so great seeing an old friend (that I hadn’t seen since my 30th birthday, two and a half years ago), and finally meeting his beautiful girlfriend – we had a wonderful dinner, after which we headed to the Bellagio for some after-dinner drinks and conversation.  We went to the Fontana Bar, and sat out on the patio, which overlooks the fountains at the Bellagio.  We were there kind of late, so the fountains were going off every 15 minutes, and the view was spectacular (thanks to Val for scoring us that table)!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I’ll post about the rest of our trip later today (with more pictures).  I just wanted to give you all something to tide you over since you have been so patient!

Kerry

I sneezed tonight and peed a little in my pants.  Nice.  I didn’t think that was going to happen for a few more months, but I guess these little ones are taking up more room, so they are closer to my bladder?  Good times.  =)

Anyway – Jeff and I are getting the dogs ready for a long weekend at Grammy and Grampy’s (Jeff’s parents) house, and then we are off early tomorrow morning for LAS VEGAS!!!!!  We won’t be back until Monday night, and I’m not making any promises as far as updating the blog, but I will try.

Have a great weekend, everyone!

Kerry

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SIS!!!!!!

October 23, 2008

Today is my favorite (and only) little sister, Kristy’s 30th birthday.  Please join me in wishing her a happy 30th birthday!  We are meeting her and her husband, Joel, in Vegas on Saturday and I CANNOT WAIT!!!!  Neither her or Joel have been to Las Vegas before, so it should be a great time.  I have several surprises under my sleeve for the trip, and I can’t wait to tell you all about them!

For now, I just want to write a quick note to my sister:

Dear Kristy,

You were my first, and will always be my lifelong best friend.  I don’t think I could have “picked a better baby out of the forest” than you, and I’m really glad we decided to keep you.  =)  Looking back, I’m so thankful that we (for the most part) were so close growing up, and that we’re even closer now…I just can’t imagine having a better suited sibling and best buddy than you.  There was a point when I was a little worried about the direction you were taking in your life, and I’m sure that you worried just the same with some of the choices I made, but I think we both made out pretty well, don’t you think?  You are a beautiful, smart, talented, creative, energetic, fun, loving, and loyal person, and I couldn’t be more proud of what you have become.  I can’t wait to see what the future brings for both of us, and I cannot WAIT to celebrate your big day with you this weekend!

Love,

Sis

Lovely.

October 22, 2008

I should have known better than to think that my face would clear up once I was off the IVF drugs.  Holy crap.  It seriously looks like a grenade exploded on my face (and neck – who gets zits on their neck?!?!?).  And I’m not so vain that it bothers me to have acne, I had acne in my teen years, acne so bad that I was on Accutane for it (harsh stuff – you have to be on birth control, you get blurred vision and dry lips, you can’t see to drive at night).  It’s not just how it looks, it’s how it feels.  It hurts.  Bad.  And the seem to get bigger throughout the day, and are so painful by the time I leave work that I just want to cry.  I used to actually like popping zits (I know – gross – but I know some of you are just like me in that aspect – ADMIT IT!), but now I dread that time of the day.

I totally realize that this is a petty vent, and I should be thankful for being pregnant with twins, blah, blah, blah.  I’m just having a little pity party, and really – you don’t have to join me.  I just needed a sounding board, and what better place than our blog?  Plus, remember that post about everything not always being roses and sunshine?  =)

Kerry

Infertility Awareness Week

October 21, 2008

This week, October 19-25, is Infertility Awareness Week.  If you had told me three years ago that I was going to care about Infertility Awareness Week, I would have just shrugged my shoulders, but a lot has happened in the last three years.  As a couple, Jeff and I are infertile.  Chances are, we wouldn’t have been able to conceive had it not been for the miracle of science, and we thank our lucky stars for that every single day.

A lot of people think that infertility is a label that you slap on someone when they are getting impatient with the “natural” process of conceiving children.  The people that think that way tend to think those people just need to “relax”, and let things happen as they may.  They are clueless to the fact that infertility is a disease, and you can’t just “relax” to cure it.  Infertility happens in some way, shape, or form in one out of every six American couples.  One in six.  Chances are if you don’t know anyone struggling with infertility that’s because they are private with their struggle, or perhaps they are ashamed to “admit defeat” on something as natural as conceiving a child.

For Jeff and I, our struggle was a very public one.  After dealing with it silently for several months, we discovered that we needed the support of our friends and family to help us deal with what soon became a very difficult situation.  The last three years have been hella-hard, to the point that sometimes I wondered if this thing called “infertility” would take my marriage.  There were times in the beginning of our struggle when it bothered me more, and I was pissed at Jeff for not being more supportive, sad, empathetic, etc.  There were times about a year and a half in when it bothered Jeff more, and he would wonder why I was beginning to just not give a shit about it.  I became despondent and withdrawn, and I almost didn’t care anymore.  We didn’t need kids, we had each other, right?

When I finally pulled my head out of my ass about all of this, and we really began focusing on our infertility and our strong desire to have at least one child, we were a team.  Team Mastera.  Nobody could stop us – we were going to win this battle, no matter what the cost.  And oh the cost – it still sickens me to this day thinking about all of the money we’ve spent on our dream of having children.  The fact that we have absolutely nothing in savings because of the two tiny little beings in my belly both frightens me and excites me at the same time.  We got lucky.  We know that.  But man, thinking of raising two children in this day and age with no “nest egg” is scary business.  Anyway, back to Team Mastera – when we turned our attitudes around that this was going to work, it just happened.  We got to that point where we KNEW we would be parents – some way, some how.

Enough of my incessant rambling…I just wanted to recognize Infertility Awareness Week in some way.  Being infertile for three years changed me.  I think it made me a much more compassionate, caring person (correct me if I’m wrong), and I know it made me a better wife.  It strengthened Jeff and I’s marriage like nothing else probably would have, and I can honestly say that if we can get through the ups and downs of infertility, we can get through anything. 

Kerry

Please don’t tell me that you aren’t going to vote because the issues “don’t affect you”, because I promise you in most cases that isn’t true.  I’ve taken this link from my friend’s blog, and I hope she doesn’t mind…

http://www.seculargovernment.us/a48.shtml

If someone you know thinks voting isn’t important, forward them this link.  If this Amendment were to pass, it would make in-vitro fertilization illegal in the state of Colorado.  Without IVF, Jeff and I wouldn’t have been able to have our own children, and BoGo wouldn’t be making their appearance next spring. 

Not to mention I don’t need ANYONE telling me what I can and cannot do with MY BODY.

Kerry

13 weeks today!!!

October 19, 2008

What a milestone!  The 13th week is the last week in the first trimester, which means that our chances of a miscarriage after this week are SIGNIFICANTLY reduced.  Thank God.  For me, I can’t believe how fast the time has gone between when we found out I was pregnant to this very moment.  It’s crazy.  I still have lots of days and instances when I cannot believe that this is happening, and I’m finally able to actually enjoy being pregnant, as most of the nausea is gone now (I still get waves every so often).

The little ones are the size of a peach (mmmmm, peaches), and there really isn’t much going on this week.  Vocal chords and teeth are forming, and they already have their own unique little fingerprints now.  Their bodies are now starting to catch up with their ginormous heads, and they should each weigh around an ounce.

Jeff is now in SERIOUS nesting mode, although I don’t really think he likes that term.  LOL!  One of the reasons there hasn’t been an update since Thursday is because he has been reconfiguring the office (future office/spare bedroom), so the wireless internet has been unavailable for the last two days.  I feel so disconnected from the world!

We went to Target on Friday night to get some storage/shelving units and a new lamp for the office part of the spare bedroom, and it’s coming along quite nicely.  I’m thinking that we will need to paint, as the office is painted a dark steel grey color, and it doesn’t really match the bedding we have for our guest bed.  I know Jeff is bummed that I’m getting rid of another “piece of him” (he picked out the color after a lot of debate with me four years ago), but I know that he knows that it will be a better color for the room.  I’m thinking of doing one (or two) walls a deep chocolate brown, and the other two walls a more neutral light brown or beige color.  Depending on the genders of BoGo, I may carry that neutral color into their bedroom, too.  We’ll see.  Just a few more weeks!

Saturday afternoon was heavenly for me.  I had both a haircut and highlight (which I desperately needed) and an hour-long prenatal massage.  I hadn’t seen my stylist since a few days before we found out I was pregnant, and I felt like complete crap that day, so it was nice to be feeling good, and be able to gossip with her like always.  I got some subtle highlights in my hair, and then some warmer lowlights (not the darker that I had been doing), and about an inch cut from the length, and it looks fantastic.  I love Alex – she’s the BEST!  Jeff met me after my appointment, and we went to lunch and then went stroller browsing.  Talk about being overwhelmed!!!  We went to two places, and at the second store we found exactly what we want…only it’s almost $500.  The good news about it is that it can be used from birth up to when each child is 40 lbs, so it will last us a while, but the bad news is we do not have $500.  I think we are going to continue to look around, and hopefully find last year’s model for a discounted rate.  Anyway, it was fun to finally feel like we are “safe” to be preparing for two babies.  =)  Later in the afternoon, and thanks to my awesome sister-in-law (who gave me a gift card), I had a prenatal massage.  It was just what the doctor ordered, and I still feel fantastic today!  The massage therapist told me that I was really, really tight – especially in my neck, arms, shoulders, and upper back – and I felt it as she was working the knots out.  I left there feeling like a whole new woman, came home, and crashed out for about 45 minutes. 

Last night, Jeff and I went to a bar/restaurant to celebrate our friend, Ryan’s, 30th birthday.  It was a really good time, and it was awesome to see some old friends.  I feel bad that I didn’t really talk much with the birthday boy, but I did talk to the girls about all things baby, which was awesome.  These girls have had children for a while now (Jaime and Cami have almost-two-year-olds, and Kari’s daughter will be one next month), and I’ve never been able to participate in any conversation about babies with them before, which always made me jealous and really sad.  Last night was different though – I felt like one of them.  And man, did it feel good!  I lasted until 10:30, which is more than I can say for my husband, who started yawning at about 9!  I think he was just really tired from all of the hard work he did in the office yesterday!

Kerry