I’m baaaaaaack

July 23, 2008

I’m going to preface this post by saying that Jeff and I spent a good chunk of time trying to get the formatting to work the way I wanted it to, so this post looked “right” to me.  After almost suffering a nervous hormonal breakdown, and Jeff fixing some of the formatting errors, I decided to give up.  Stupid fucking hormones.

I’m back.  And tired as all hell.  Last night (the Dave Matthews Band concert) was AWESOME.  I’ll spare you every single detail of the show, but will say that they played my two favorite songs (“#41” and “Sister”), Tim Reynolds played the ENTIRE show with them, and our seats were AMAZING.  Kristy thinks that since they played my two favorite songs, this IVF will be successful (it has to be a sign, right?), so I’m just going to roll with that.  A few pics of my favorite little sis and I, just because…

Having drinks and apps before the show...

Having drinks and apps before the show...

  

...and a funny candid that Joel took!

...and a funny candid that Joel took!

                                                                                    

 

I have to say that during the show, they played a song called “Dancing Nancies”, and I started really listening to the words (like I haven’t heard this song about five million times, but anyway…).  The following lyrics really got to me (I got a little emotional, stupid hormones):

 “Dark clouds may hang on me sometimes, but I’ll work it out, then I

Look up at the sky, my mouth is open wide, lick and taste

What’s the use in worrying, what’s the use in hurrying

Turn, turn we almost become dizzy…”

 

I guess it just reminded me of the long journey that Jeff and I have been on to have the dream of becoming a family come true.  So many speed bumps along the road, but we have always managed to keep our eyes on the road, and get home safely.  And with all of the worrying I do, I just need to chill and let the doctors and science do their thing and make us a baby (or babies)!

 

And then, the lyrics of the song “Sister” really made me tear up, but that’s only because I was feeling particularly lucky to be with my most favorite sister in the world seeing my favorite band in the world.  A lot of people don’t have good relationships with their siblings, so I always feel so fortunate to have such an amazing relationship with my one and only sibling.  Here are the lyrics to the song (don’t cry, Mom):

 

Passing time with you in mind
It’s another quiet night
Feel the ground against my back
Counting stars against the black

Think about another day
Wishing I was far away
Wherever I dreamed I was
You were there with me

(Chorus)
Sister, I hear you laugh
My heart fills full up
Keep me please
Sister, when you cry
I feel your tears
Running down my face
Sister, sister, keep me

I hope you always know it’s true
I would never make it through
You could make the sun go dark
Just by walking away

Playing like we used to play
Like it would never go away
I feel you beating in my chest
I’d be dead without

(Chorus)
Sister, I hear you laugh
My heart fills full up
Keep me please
Sister, when you cry
I feel your tears
Running down my face
Sister, sister, you keep me

I hope you always know it’s true
I would never make it through
You could make the heavens fall
Just by walking away

(Chorus)
Sister, I hear you laugh
My heart fills full up
Keep me please
Sister, when you cry
I feel your tears
Running down my face
Sister, sister, you keep me

:::tears:::

 

I guess I’m feeling a little (okay, a lot) emotional today.  Jeff is sitting next to me nodding in agreement at that last sentence.  Poor guy.  It’s just going to get worse.

 

So today was considered Day One of our IVF cycle.  My period should be here any day now (which could explain the major hormone levels changing right now…), and I go in tomorrow for an ultrasound and blood work to make sure that my body is ready to start the next round of drugs.  If they give us the thumbs up tomorrow, we will pay the balance of what we owe for the IVF (boooooooo), and start the stim drugs on Friday (yaaaaaaay).  I’ll keep y’all posted…

 

Kerry

 

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4 Responses to “I’m baaaaaaack”

  1. Beth M said

    It sounds like you had a much needed wonderful time with your sis! PLEASE let me know if there is anything I can do for you or Jeff. I’m here!

  2. Tarah said

    So glad that you had a great time. I’m sorry we didn’t get a chance to meet up. Hopefully next time.

    Love ya,

    T

  3. Lanie said

    Your song lyrics are making me tear up! You know, I’m on the hormones too, chickie.

  4. Ondrea said

    Love the candid shot of you and your sister – you are both so beautiful – and so glad that you had a rocking time at DMB!!!!

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