3 down, 13 to go

July 7, 2008

WTF?  Yesterday was “2 down, 12 to go”, so why is today “3 down, 13 to go”?  Well, if you would have read my post from earlier, you would know that my nurse has added two more days of birth control to my protocol so that I can go to Omaha to visit my sis.  YAY!  =)

One more thing to add – tonight I had a vision in my head on who the “unknown friend” was from my bizarre dream last night.  I know who it was.  It was a friend who I haven’t spoken to in over a year, who used to be very important to me.  I know at the time we last spoke he didn’t mean it (or at least I hope he didn’t), but he belittled the fact that Jeff and I were struggling with infertility.  He said something about it being “silly” that we were so consumed with it, and at the time I just couldn’t deal with having a friend who thought that way.  I have been missing him lately, so I decided to go out on a limb and Google him (LOVE Google, so cool).  I found his email address, so I shot him an email.  We’ll see what happens…

On a related note, I know some people just do not understand how damn hard it is to struggle with infertility.  Like I’ve said before, it’s a medical condition, not something that just “goes away” after time, or after you finally have a baby.  I don’t care if I get knocked up with triplets – I will ALWAYS be infertile.  I will NEVER forget how having this horrible thing happen to Jeff and I both strengthened and weakened certain aspects of our marriage.  Yeah, it sucks that we have lost friends due to the fact that they don’t think dealing with infertility is a big deal, but when I really think about it, I know we don’t need those kind of people in our lives.

There are studies that suggest that dealing with infertility is similar to dealing with a very serious illness like cancer or diabetes.  Now I’m not suggesting that infertility is “as important or serious” as cancer or diabetes, but I’m just telling you that if you want to know what it’s like, just think of yourself, or someone you know who has been concerned about a loved one who has cancer or diabetes.  I have a few people in this world who I don’t care for, and I wouldn’t even wish infertility on them.  That’s saying a lot. 

Kerry

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3 Responses to “3 down, 13 to go”

  1. Angelika said

    I just wanted to give you a HUG, and I don’t hug so that’s a big deal!

  2. Brandi said

    Big hugs to both you and Jeff. This post really hit home for me…I know exactly what you mean. Hang in there. The one thing the infertility struggle does reveal is how strong you and your partner are together. It is clear from reading all of your entries that you and Jeff are a very strong unit.

  3. Kristy said

    Ummmm…does this mean I don’t get to give you your shots? Because I started to think of all the mean tricks you played on me when we were little (“My eyes are stuck”, “I’m the babysitter, I say NO”) and got kind of excited to exact my revenge. Joel was even going to take pictures of me sticking you with the needle and giving the thumbs up.

    Just kidding! (Kind of…)

    I can’t wait to see you the week after next! Hopefully we will have so much fun that you can take your mind off your C and your U for awhile 🙂

    Love you both tons!

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